In my previous story, “Clumsy Valerie: Part II,” I described the ridiculously awful tale of the time when I accidentally hit a very nice kid in the face while in the middle of a crowded lecture hall.
Well, what goes around, comes around, even if it takes a few years. So when I got (accidentally) punched in the face a week ago, I couldn’t help but find it painfully hilarious.
But also just straight up painful.
For my last semester of college, I’ve been taking a self-defense class. It’s just good to have a little know-how, especially since I live in a big city. We’ve been practicing how to throw someone off of you if you’re pinned to the ground, and with a lot of practice, I’ve gotten pretty good at it.
But I should probably work on my blocking. Boy, did I learn that very well last week, although technically I wasn’t on defense at the point.
You see, we were told to pair up and practice before our performance test, in which we would go back and forth being aggressor/defender in this crazy flip-someone-off-of-you routine. While practicing with a guy in class, his job was to throw me off, and then I would do the same.
We never got to the second part, unfortunately.
Because, in a freak accident where he tried to grab behind my shoulder to pull me down for the turn, his hand collided directly into my nose.
Hard.
Having never been punched in the face before, it was the strangest sensation: my nose started prickling, my eyes began watering, and I started to lose my balance.
He looked mortified. In the midst of his apologies, I thought I felt something weird. I instinctively reached for my right nostril.
It was bleeding, alright.
That’s right, ladies and gentlemen, I was accidentally punched in the face.
(Okay, I guess it wasn’t quite a punch, but it sounds a lot cooler if I say it that way. It was still bad.)
Despite being stunned and bleeding, I was in pretty good spirits. It reminded me of Troy in Community when he explains to Jeff what it was like to get punched:
Source: YouTube/NBC
Source: YouTube/NBC
So, through the pain, I thought it was pretty funny. It also brought back the memory of me accidentally hitting that poor guy in my freshman midterm, so it seemed somehow fitting that someone else would return the favor just before I’m about to leave college.
Plus, I got to be that pseudo-hardcore girl in the back of the dojo with blood coming down her face because she got punched while practicing.
Still hurt, though. It was a punch, for crying out loud.
(Sort of a punch.)
And that’s why Karma: That Guy Who Punched Me in the Face was my least favorite person of the day.
leastfavoritepersonoftheday 